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| 08:52pm 31/03/2005 |
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Sex
Dim lights, cigarette smoke
Small hole, want to poke
Pushing and shoving
Making some loving
Pubic hair in the way
Exasperated in the hay
Fellatio, sodomy, rape
Societies pressure, no escape
Jesus says that sex is a sin
That is why he has no kin
Society is dependent upon sex
So why do we make it so complex
We lie and steal
So that we can feel
The warmth that is deep within
Some call it love, but this warmth is wafer thin
Why do we proceed, to take what we think we need
When all we need is love, not even a roof above
We are driven by our instincts to fuck
So that those of us with no luck
Will not be able to procreate
In the society that we create
Sexy women are all around
Big and thin, light and brown
I want to show them how to give me head
And if possible, show them how I work in bed
I and most other guys will do anything to get laid
While some girls will do anything to get paid
Some women are sweet and kind
But those kind of girls pay me no mind
It is all the big and nasty girls that want the love
I am glad that I always carry around a latex glove
Most of them do not think they deserve
That is why they serve
Yet std’s are all around
They cause people to have frowns
When we want to be able to make a score
With the cute librarian, or the whore
We are prohibited due to conscience
Though the temptation can be intense
Just because she should not have a disease
Before she knows about the birds and the bees
Women are pretty, I want to fuck most of them
Everything I have done, I would do again
I would not take back what I did to her
Not even so I can get back into her
I will not even pay for the treatment
Not unless I get charged of law infringement
I temporarily feel bad
But if I hadn’t
Some other guy most definitely would have
The smell, the feeling, is undescribeable
But without it, we are all unstable
Sex is a topic, generally considered taboo
But liberation for all is overdue
If society refuses to open its eyes
To the beauty between womens thighs
The future of the world is at stake,
Should we make our ancestors mistakes?
Once you have had sex for the first time
It is imperative to have it all the time
Some resort to masturbation to get the high
This can be unhealthy if someone has to spy
But someone creeping around with a cape
Is a lot better than a girl being raped
Society and sex go hand in hand
So you should take into account that I am a man
My opinions might be a little skewed
Hopefully it did not come off as rude
23-47-52-80
call me baby |
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| 08:10am 04/02/2005 |
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My poem entitled
Boarding School
Mental problems, non repent
medication, single parent
Nomads, Social retards
Losers, emotionally scarred
drug users, cigarette smokers
beer drinkers, weed tokers
Late nights, annoying
lack of privacy, stealing
Bans, boredom
nymphos, std's
Deep rooted hatred
No condoms, Mated
Lack of intelligence
No common sense
You people, immature
Impossible to endure
Parents, no love
Parents, dispose of
Stench, unclean
Majority of girls, act 14 |
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| 08:10pm 02/02/2005 |
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Beer
Beer, I owe so much to your existence
and your constant social assistance
You make my jokes funny,
and girls the playboy bunny
If only it were not considered a crime
to have one of you all the time
when will people open their eyes
that beer should be decriminalized
You have helped me see many things in life
just a few are jesus, buddah, and allah
All beer is good,
but my favorite brand comes from guatemala
Beer, you are something that can be drunk in moderation
But how is it possible to resist your barley temptation
Beer can let you entartain
Beer can make you act like an ass
But one thing for certain
is that beer will give you gas.
For pain and misery you are responsible
But I guess I am just irresponsible |
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| 11:59am 22/01/2005 |
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Poem about white trash...
white trash
Trailer park living
Fat kid being
Report card failing
stubby legs a wailing
You have no front teeth
Your skull has nothing underneath
pretty Girls will never call
Off the tractor you always fall
You live with your kin on a farm
With your shotgun, you cause harm
You drive your pickup to the store over the hill
Running over small animals means you like to kill
You refuse to talk with the 'colored' folk
But you look like them because you dont use soap
Famous for snorting coke
Your sister you poke
Always eating chew
you smell like a zoo
you wonder why you have a rash
I think its because your white trash |
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| 11:41am 19/01/2005 |
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I take back ever saying that 'The Da'Vinci Code' was the best book I ever read. That title now belongs to 'The Never Ending Story'.
In case you lacked a childhood, The Never Ending Story tells the story of Bastian and his flying dog/dragon falkor. Who have to save the childlike princess and the ivory tower. This book is possibly the best thing to ever come out of Germany. |
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| 07:21pm 08/12/2004 |
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I finished 'The Da Vinci Code' in two days. It was one of the best books I have ever read. |
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| 02:12pm 29/11/2004 |
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Getting prepared for my arrival back in Texas. I will be flying out of here on the 22nd, will be met up with 3 of my friends from Denmark. Anyone want to come and show them a proper Texas time with me? I was thinking about taking them to a shooting range, rodeo, and of course barton springs. One of the guys that is coming is the best skateboarder in all of denmark, which is great because I get free shit.
I will try to bring back some absinthe, but do not know how much success I will have with that. Are there any alcohol requests? Danish beer is exponentially better than that from back home, so I will be bring lots of that back for my dad.
Thanksgiving was nice, we had a very multicultural evening. There were Norwegians, Muslims, Danish people, Pittsburghers, and my homeslice from Brooklyn. The party was celebrated in the proper American fashion with a food eating competition and everyone wearing elastic pants. Thanksgiving has to be the best holiday to come from America.
Last week was our schools prom, or kaffebal. The theme of the fest was 'One night in Arabia'. The only logic outfit that I could find for the evening was to be a fully decked out soldier. For the record, every single other person there was dressed as a muslim extremist. The girls were all equipped with shawls and the guys with turbans or fez's. I fit in well. |
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| Wonderful Day. |
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| 06:55pm 22/10/2004 |
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mood: accomplished music: The prodigy (they are playing tonight, but tickets cost 50$)
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Today is friday, and everyone knows that friday is a wonderful day full of transitions. This is why today I decided that 3 things need to happen. Out of the three goals I set this morning, two are accomplished and the third will soon be finished. All this at the wonderful time of 19:00 hours.
The first of these things was quite unplanned, but the lowdown is that a girl got out of line, and had to be put back in her place. This girl's name was nadja, the words danish pop girl best describes her. She slapped me to try and prove some whorish point that if she misbehaves; she will get away with it... wrong! She was ranting on about how she would lay down the law if my friend grabbed her ass, which he did. Now, this scenario has occured before, and every time she does not fulfill her end of the bargain(slapping one of us). The rest of the story falls into place with her slapping me, and me retaliating and knocking her glasses off. w00t.
Now, my girlfriend and I have not been talking much recently. This means that I lose interest, and the only logical conclusion is that we need to break up. I do so, she takes it like a champ. Problem solved.
Now I have about a gram of hash waiting to be smoked, that is my third goal.
A day fulfilled with excitement, and plenty more to come. Now its time to finish my halloween costume. |
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| 11:11am 05/10/2004 |
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Got a little homesick today and decided to check out what the old cool kid lj group of kids were up to. Some of you girls actually got pretty, which suprised me. |
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| Texas |
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| 04:00pm 06/07/2004 |
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Being back in texas has seen me some horror
such as killer lawn mowers,
plumbers who want to plunge in for the kill
and give the parents a 400$ bill
Hellborn computers
whos homepage is set to porn
look at that used to be entertaining
but now I am too sore so am complaining
watching all this television
stops my brain at the anaphase phase of cell division
the weather is hot in houston city
so hot that even taking a shower doesnt make it any less shitty
can not wait to go to the A town
where I will be the coolest danish kid around
because there are no others
who would even bother
to go to that little old country
where both alcohol and weed are free to use
and all the americans abuse
do not know which country I should occupy
this occupation will probably be until I die
all these thoughts on the first day
makes me glad I will be getting out of houston in 4 days |
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| Fuck girls |
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| 03:43pm 15/03/2004 |
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I am really starting to dislike girls,
and how hot they think they are with their hair in curls,
The way they use their power over men,
is why males run the Nation,
They spend all our money on make up and nails,
but dont even know how to work a mop and pail,
But I get the last laugh because in private they resent high heels and panty hose,
All the while I am so bored that I begin to pick my nose,
I need a real WHOA-MAN,
one that when I see walking down the street, I say DDDDAMN!
Girls are all either extremly prude,
or act obnoxiously rude,
When they find out what it is we really want...
That my friend is their cunt,
This poem is being said is long overdo,
Because I was lost and didnt know what to do,
Thinking I wanted a girl with a nice rack,
Who enjoyed laying on her back,
I now realize
That I need a woman who has trustworthy eyes |
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| 01:09am 08/03/2004 |
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Rum vodka scotch,
it all tastes like crotch
but will get you drunk fast
and will definatly last
Pirates love to drink it
so I know that it's the shiznit
Pirates kick some major ass
especially when they have no class
pirates are my idols
they all kick so much villian ass
they make jesus check his vitals
because he wish he could be as bad ass
everyone likes pirates because of movies
but those tards havent even seen boobies
but I will not trust their opinions
because pirates have done so many killings
'pirates eat rocks and shit gunpowder'
this is a quote from xmission
that guy is a pirate that eats clam chowder
I hope I can quote without permission |
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| 10:29pm 13/02/2004 |
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| FRANCE |
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| 10:06pm 13/02/2004 |
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france, what to say about france
half the time I was there
I wanted to be attacked by a fucking bear
I hate france
I stayed in monaco
It was a shitty little country
With entirely to much money
Suck my balls monaco
I spent some time in a city called cannes
It sucked so bad
all the people made me mad
So spiderman, go to cannes, and kick some ass
The good things about my trip where
the food, and the people I was with
even though half had no hair
The food was good, I like frog
I doubt how well I would fare
if I unfortunately went back there
because all those fuckers who play golf
I royally pissed off |
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| My christmas present to my sister |
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| 12:09pm 01/01/2004 |
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Phoebe
Pheobe, I hereby proclaim
That I just mis-pelt your name
It can be either pheobe or phoebe
If I get it wrong, just sue me
I can’t believe you and I are related
This is getting written now so it’s not belated
You are the sister of pirates
But nothing rhymes with pirates
It’s true we are not fairies
Because on our shoulders rest canaries
You drive a mobile oven
And when youre in a traffic jam
You act like a coven
Who had to see shaqs movie shazzam
You buy me the best gifts
But always end up in sniffs
And if I reminisce
Its because I give you crap like this
You wear your funny orange shoes
For christmas tor got you booze
So I hope you open this one last
Or else tor will kill me fast
What better way to show you my love
Than with a gift you cant make any use of |
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| My christmas present to my brother |
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| 12:07pm 01/01/2004 |
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Tor
Tor, you try to be a pirate to the core
But end up being a stupid whore
You are my only true brother
But you have a different mother
You told me I was found,
But mom said it’s the other way around,
We picked you up from the humane society
You have no clue about the word sobriety
So let me construe
Some more about you
And your anal-ness
About your playstation 2
The games have to be perfect
Am I not correct?
But see, you hate shopping with me
Because I act like I am from tennessee
You think its stupid to act so dumb
But in reality you have succumbed
To the woman of your dreams
And cannot be redeemed
Tor, you’re my brother for life,
And how I love this stife
How is this for a christmas present
At least now my card Is’nt over spent |
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| POETRY |
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| 02:09pm 24/11/2003 |
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My friend preston and I just signed up to read our peotry at the schools culture day. This will be fucking grand |
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| My Christmas Poem About me going home |
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| 08:55pm 17/11/2003 |
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Im going home
So now I will write
This little Poem
so I dont feel contrite
Denmark is dark
So its impossible to see
The great bird known as a lark
which is the size of a bee
But I am going home to visit my family
In my humble opinion, this will be
the best damn Holidays ever
and ever, and ever
I want to see my old friends
and see if they still talk to me
because I am an ass
they just might have to pass
on seing me again
Even as a friend,
In Denmark I could not be happier
but there is a void
where all the people I used to know
Seem to slowly go
In this dark little hole
I only remember the best
Because frankly, the rest
Is just me being an ass |
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| Beer makes people hate me |
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| 09:55pm 02/11/2003 |
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halloween. Dressed up like a wrestler, showed everyone my cock-n-balls. It was a fucking ball, now have a dance partner for prom, no katie forest |
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muffincrust's journal